Deep Breaths It’s Okay to Ask for Help I’ve noticed that I’m different from a few years ago. Things I rarely contemplated now occupy my thoughts, while parts of my body I didn’t know existed suddenly demand attention. I’m not as agile as I once was. Whether it’s aging, grief, or the trauma of living through pandemics—COVID-19 and racism—things that once felt easy now seem more complicated. This shift has made me realize that I need to ask for help. I’ve long prided myself on self-sufficiency as a mother, wife, minister, retired nurse, and scholar. Didn’t Paul say, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me”? I’ve pushed through challenges, but now even simple tasks feel daunting. We haven't fully addressed the toll the pandemic has taken on us. The past few years unraveled our worlds—death, destruction, racism, police brutality, and the world screaming for justice, only to experience our current regression. Our minds are cluttered with rapid news cycles and cruelty disguised as faith. I’ve felt overwhelmed and numb. But I now recognize that “grind culture” is detrimental to our bodies and spirits. It fosters distrust, competition, and isolation. I’m working to dismantle the “strong Black woman” myth; asking for help is not weakness, but a return to community. If you’re struggling, remember that asking for help is a holy invitation—it allows others to share their gifts and fosters community. If you notice someone who appears self-sufficient, especially those from marginalized and intersectional identities, gently offer your help. Small acts of care are impactful. Let’s support one another, give and receive love, and remember: We don’t have to navigate this alone. Reflection questions: Who in your life might be carrying more than they show, and how can you offer them gentle care? If you hesitate to ask for help, what stops you, and how can you take the first step? Recommended reading: Black Liturgies (Cole Arthur Riley), Rest is Resistance (Tricia Hersey), All About Love (bell hooks), The Strong Black Woman (Marita Golden), My Grandmother’s Hands (Resmaa Menakem), Jesus and the Disinherited (Howard Thurman), Emergent Strategy (adrienne maree brown). ––Rev. Moya Harris, Director of Racial Justice, Sojourners
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